I was on my way to Kroger to get more boxed Chardonnay and some sour cream for a lime crema sauce when I passed by the 5G tower and the Shadow Government activated the chip I received from my “COVID vaccine.” I remember thinking, “I should get a few more limes,” and then, “Where is all the baby formula going? And all the wheat? It’s so clear now that they are connected and Hillary Clinton is eating all the wheat and baby formula!”
I drove home quickly to find T in the kitchen with an auger in her hand, a leather pouch in the other, and a tin foil hat on her head. I thought, “That’s strange. T doesn’t wear hats.”
“Here,” she said, handing me the small satchel. “I smashed up all the Wheat Thins and rolled a hobo for his Metamucil. You need to start planting so we will have wheat when the Illuminati takes all of it.”
“Is that why you have the auger?”
“No, I’m digging for oil in the backyard,” said T. I glanced out the window to see about thirty holes in the yard. “They are intentionally pricing us out of gas so we are helpless to go anywhere. Then they will take our guns and our baby formula and our wheat. We need to make our own gasoline. Find a recipe!”
“If we plant the wheat outside, the birds will get it all,” I pointed out.
“Those aren’t birds,” whispered T. “They are all drones. But, yes, the drones will take the wheat to Hillary so plant them inside.”
Surely the recipe for gasoline is printed on the side of the pumps so I jumped back in my car and drove to the station. There were bags on all the pumps. The Kabal had already erased the recipe when they thieved all the gas. It was the only explanation.
Just then a black SUV roared by, clipping my side, knocking me to the ground. The SUV had a triangle on the side with the steely eye of Hillary Clinton in the center of the triangle. Three sides, three points. The word three has five letters. The word five has four letters. Four has four letters. It stops at four.
AND THEN IT HIT ME.
Eleven has six letters.
Eleven(6) → Six(3) → Three(5) → Five(4) → Four(4)
Thirty one has nine letters.
Thirty one(9) → Nine(4) → Four(4)
Every number leads to four!
Sixty seven(10) → Ten(3) → Three(5) → Five(4) → Four(4)
One million Fifty Eight(20) → Twenty(6) → Six(3) → Three(5) → Five(4) → Four(4)
Googleplex(10) → Ten(3) → Three(5) → Five(4) → Four(4)
Infinity(7) → Seven(5) → Five(4) → Four(4)
The ancient Phoenites had deliberately structured our alphanumeric system to point to four. The word “Phoenites” is from the Greek “Sounds like the end”. All roads lead to Rome, indeed! Rome has four letters.
As I lay on the ground by the sabotaged gas pump I found a nearby rock and dipped it in the blood of my lacerated thigh. I started to sketch out the Truth on the pavement when a Blackhawk helicopter swept in and landed in the parking lot. Several black-clad goons with assault rifles that were probably taken from innocent quail hunters marched towards me with stylish dark steel-toed boots with lightweight Kevlar-midsoles (available on Amazon).
A man in an imposing trench coat stepped forward. “You are getting too close,” he hissed. He pressed a click in his hand and my mind snapped back to the thought, “I need to pick up some more limes.”
I managed to ask, “What about T? She is digging holes and swatting at crow drones.”
He tossed me the clicker, which looked just like a wireless key for a car with lock and unlock symbols. “You should probably deactivate her before she over aerates your lawn.”
***
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